TITLE: BROKEN HEARTS AND DREAMS AUTHOR: Hazelkerrie RATING: 12 SERIES: Part two of the 'Love and Bluntz' series SUMMERY: Jay's alone and upset, but finds a friend. NOTES: Noble again made me write this instalment, I don't think that robot bunny's prozac dosage is high enough. DISCLAIMER: I own nothing 'cept that damned rabbit and a bottle of cider. Kevin Smith owns everything else, except the song 'Ain't no sunshine' which is owned by Tori Amos I believe. ARCHIVE: If you want to, but archive the whole series and please let me know where its going. FEEDBACK: hazelkerrie@yahoo.com # New York # The past three weeks that Jay had spent in the city had been OK, until two days ago when his landlord had kicked him out, so some chick he was banging could stay there. Then yesterday he had been mugged by some local gang who had taken most of his money and all of his pot. Now in the warm morning sunshine, Jay sat on the park bench, which had last night been his bed, watching the rollerbladers and the people walking their dogs, all the while trying not to think about Silent Bob and what had happened. ****************************** # Leonardo, New Jersey # Bob had spent the last three weeks frantically searching for Jay, to no avail. The blonde hadn't been to any of his usual haunts, and Jersey was beginning to seen very quiet without the little sonic boom running off at the mouth every second. He had phoned everyone they knew at least twice, but no one had seen or heard anything of Jay in weeks. Sat at the kitchen table, deliberating over whether to have breakfast, Bob read the note that Jay had left. This had become his morning ritual. He would sit here, drink his coffee, read the note and go over what had happened that last night. *What did happen?* thought the silent man, *I had a dream that Jay was giving me the best head I've ever had and when I woke up he really was.* Bob shook his head, trying to forget the look of panic and fear he had witnessed in his friend's eyes, when had realised Bob was awake. Then it suddenly dawned on him, *He thought I was angry, that I was gonna kick his ass.* And at that realisation, Bob placed his head in his hands and began to quietly sob his heart out. ****************************** By 2 o'clock in the afternoon, Jay had been walking the streets for three hours. He was lost in a city he didn't know very well with only 50 bucks to his name. Deep in sad thoughts about Bob and the fact that he was sleeping on a park bench again that night, he didn't even notice the gang members from the previous day, until they knocked him to the ground. "Lets see what else you got," sneered one of them, Jay assumed he must be the leader, as they dragged him into an alley. Too confused and depressed to care, he didn't even fight back when the fists began to rain down on him. "I like his hair," said one. "I bet he has a sweet ass, " chimed in another. Jay groaned inwardly and felt his eyes go wide and mind-numbing, bone- crunching fear welled up inside him. "Hey!" cried an angry feminine voice. "Get the hell away from him!" "Oh shit!" yelled one of the gang members, "its the witch." "Yeah its the witch and the witch is pissed!" snarled the woman Jay thought he must be blacking out as he heard her say in some strange language.... "Ados. Daerb. Rettub. Tlas!" The gang members ran away shouting and screaming that they would track her down and kill her. "Aww, that's what they always say, " she said calmly as she knelt down to inspect the damage done to the young blonde man, who was lying prone on the ground. "Honey, are you OK?" she asked, bringing her hand to his face and trying not to notice when he flinched away. "C'mon, lets get you cleaned up. My place is just round the corner." Jay allowed her to pull him to his feet, and gratefully leaned slightly on the short girl, as she wrapped an arm gently around his waist and they began to walk. ****************************** Bob walked into the quick stop, not caring that his eyes were red or that his face was tearstained. Having made his way to the counter, he stood there patiently waiting for Dante and Randall to finish their conversation. "Now you're reading hermaphroditic porn?" wailed Dante. "Yeah," his blonde friend replied, "It's sorta interesting y'know. People who can literally do it any way they want. I think its kinda cool." Dante let out an exasperated sigh and turned to get a pack of nails for Silent Bob. As he turned to face the large silent man, he took in the grief-stricken look and felt his gaze soften. "Still no word from Jay, huh?" he said. Bob hung his head. "I say good riddance to the little stoner scum bag," interjected Randall. To this Bob growled menacingly, spun on his heel and left the store without even paying for his cigarettes. As the door closed behind him, Dante turned on Randall, "That was fucking insensitive man," he said, "Couldn't you see the guy is upset?" "What?" cried the indignant blonde, "I'm not allowed to speak my mind now?" And promptly went back to his porn. ****************************** As they reached their destination, Jay looked up to read the sign above the door, 'MAGICK HAPPENS'. He stood pondering why this girl would bring him to a New Age store, only to find himself being pulled inside. He allowed himself to be manoeuvred into a chair, and watched as she locked the door behind them, feeling panic rising in his stomach. *What is she going to do to me?* he wondered. *What does she want from me? I don't feel like having sex right now. I cant believe I just thought that!* he was tugged from his thoughts by the young woman speaking softly to him. "Huh?" he asked, looking puzzled. "I said, what's your name?" she replied, gazing deeply into his eyes. "Jay." answered the young man quietly. "Jay, " she repeated, trying it out, "Short for Jason?" Seeing him nod his head, she continued, "Nice name. I'm Lilly, that's short for Lillith. It's the name of a Pagan Goddess, I chose it when I came to New York and decided to change my life around." "A Goddess?" questioned Jay, who was beginning to find his voice. "Well not exactly a Goddess, Lillith was Adam's first wife, but she got pissed because he wouldn't let her be on top when they screwed. So she spoke the ineffable name of God, escaped from Eden and indulged in a very active and varied sex life." she answered. "Huh?" came jay's confused reply. "Don't worry about it." said Lilly with a smile. "Those guys back there said yous a witch." he stated. "So what, you like worship the Devil and shit?" Lilly audibly groaned and rolled he eyes, "Yes I'm a witch and no I don't worship the Devil. You cant worship something that you don't believe in." "What was that you said to the? A spell?" he asked curiously. "Oh that," the girl laughed. Jay thought it was a pretty sound, like wind chimes. "That was just my grocery list backwards," she said. Noticing his puzzled look, she continued, "Ados, daerb, rettub, tlas, is soda, bread, butter and salt said backwards. No point wasting my power and energy on losers like them. Now lest get you cleaned up." ****************************** As Bob entered the apartment, he could hear music playing and his breath caught in his throat as he raced to Jay's room. When he got there and found it to be empty, he remembered that when he had slept in the room the night before, he had left the CD player on repeat. He walked over to the stereo, found the track he wanted, collapsed on the bed and dissolved into tears at the first line. *"Ain't no sunshine when he's gone"* ****************************** Jay pulled away sharply from Lilly's hand, which was holding cotton soaked in some slightly scented liquid. "Will it hurt?" he asked shakily. At this precise moment, Lilly thought the slim young man look like a lost little boy, and her heart melted. "No, it won't hurt. It's Tea Tree oil and Witch Hazel, it'll stop the cuts and grazes from getting infected," she dabbed at his cut lip, and looked into his eyes, "See, doesn't hurt, does it." Jay shook his head and let the read head get on with it. ****************************** Bob was woken by someone knocking on the door. He padded down the hall, hardly daring to hope that it might be Jay. As he opened the door to reveal Dante holding a six-pack and a large pizza, he could barely keep the disappointment from his face. "Hey." said the clerk nervously, as Bob ushered him through the door and into the living room. "I just wanted to apologise for what Randal said earlier. He was being a total prick." Bob nodded his agreement and sat down on the couch, motioning for his guest to do the same. Dante opened the pizza box, offering some to Bob who took a slice, then handed him a beer. "So what's going on? 'Cause, y'know if you wanna talk I'd like to listen." he said. The silent man pulled a tattered piece of paper from his pocket, handed it to the shop keeper and went back to his beer. Dante read it through a couple of times, trying to comprehend the words written before him. *Huh? What did he do? He loves silent Bob? I didn't think that guy loved anything but weed and beer.* He was speaking before he realised what he was saying, "What he did? What did he do?" The look on Silent Bob's face was painful to see and Dante couldn't keep himself from pulling the large man into a tight hug. "Whatever it is, it can't be that bad. And he says he loves you at the end of the note." At this bob's heart broke anew and he began to cry in the clerk's arms. ****************************** Jay paced up and down the store nervously, nursing a mug of sweet, flowery tasting tea, that Lilly had said would help to calm him down. "For the love of the Gods Jay. Would ya sit down already. You're making me dizzy." she cried. The tall blonde obediently did as she asked and began to bounce his foot instead. "You wanna talk about it?" she asked as she pulled her coppery hair into a rough ponytail. "What?" said Jay jumpily, as he put down his cup. "Whatever it is that's got you so stressed," she answered, "I mean if you don't want to talk about it, that's OK. You don't know me, but a problem shared and all that." Jay sat for a few moments, looking visibly pained. "I fucked up with my friend." he answered quietly, his eyes welling up with tears, "I fucked up so bad." He let the tears fall, and Lilly was at his side in seconds, holding him, stroking his hair and whispering that everything would work out in the end, as Jay wept openly into her shoulder. ****************************** Bob awoke, confused in his own bed. * How the hell did I get here?* he thought. Then everything came flooding back: Dante, pizza, beer, crying on Dante's shoulder, Jay's note. "Oh fuck!" he growled. Looking at the clock on the bedside table: 7:30pm, Bob sighed, turned over and fell into a deep all consuming sleep. ****************************** Lilly had somehow managed to drag a very despondent Jay upstairs to her apartment above the shop. Jay was now sitting on her couch, staring blankly into space. "Jay," she said as she gently shook his shoulder. Getting no response, she called his name louder and shook him more firmly. "Huh?" he replied, startled. "Time to go big boy," she replied. Jay's eyes clouded with pain, and he stood up quickly. "Oh, um, OK. I'll get out of your face. Sorry 'bout earlier." he said thickly. Lilly place her hand on his arm in a vain attempt to reassure him. "Not what I meant. You're coming grocery shopping with me. I don't have any food in, and I'm starving, dunno 'bout you." she answered with a tentative but hopeful grin. "Huh? You wanna feed me?" he asked, confused. "What can I say? You've made me go all maternal and shit. C'mon." Her grin broke into a wide smile as she took his slender hand in her own and pulled him towards the door. Once at the market Jay was nervously thinking again. *Why is she helping me? What does she want in return?* "Jay, sweetie. What do you want for dinner? I'm easy." She stopped short and laughed that wonderful tinkling laugh again, "Well didn't that just come out sad and wrong." He couldn't help himself. He let a small grin appear on his face, which grew slightly as he watched the laughter which had died from Lilly's lips, dance in her blue-grey eyes. "I don't mind" he replied. "OK you're a lot of help," she said cheerfully. "What do you like to eat?" "Um, I, um," stammered Jay, "I like pizza, burgers, fries, bagels and cream cheese." "Hmmm," mused Lilly as she popped a box of corn flakes and two boxes of chocolate Pop-Tarts into the basket. "Well I could go for a pizza. We'll order in when we get back, now we need bread, butter, soda and ... Oh damn! What else was it?" she cried. Jay stood trying to remember, a hint of amusement touching his hazel eyes. "Tlas." he said grinning. "What? Oh right, salt. Thanks smart ass." she replied, tapping him lightly on the arm. ****************************** By the time they had finished, they were both laden down with bags of food and beer, which were more cumbersome than heavy, so Lilly hailed a cab and they made it to her apartment just before the heavens opened and the thunder rolled. Lilly put away the groceries, and Jay watched the rain fall on the street below. "Damn, doesn't look like this is gonna stop anytime soon," he said, fervently wishing he had somewhere to crash tonight. "You got somewhere to stay?" asked the short redhead from the small kitchen. "Um, I can find a place." he lied, not wanting her to feel obligated to let him stay. She walked into the living room carrying two beers, she handed one to Jay. "That's settled then, you can sleep on the couch tonight." she stated clearly. Seeing Jay was about to argue, she put her free hand to his lips, "No arguments. You're staying here. The weather is atrocious and your in no fit state to be on your own." She reached into her bag and pulled out two cigarettes, handing one to the shell- shocked young man. She heard him mumble something but couldn't quite make it out. "What did you say?" "Why are you doing this? I can't pay you, those little fucks earlier got all my money." he answered, panicking slightly. "Why?" she said. "You wanna know why?" She carefully watched him nod his head. "OK, number one, you don't look all hatchety murdery to me. Two, I keep a baseball bat under my pillow so I'm not worried about protecting myself. And three, it will be good for my soul, karmically." Jay couldn't keep the puzzlement from his face. "What the fuck does that mean?" he wailed. Lilly smiled, "Karma? It's a belief held in Indian religions. Basically it means whatever you send out in the world, you get back times three." The slight blonde gave her the *What the fuck?* look again, so she continued. "OK, it's like this, by me helping you, I am sending out good Karma, and if I was ever in a similar situation in which I need help like that, I believe I would receive it because of what I had done in the past. Good or bad, you get what you give." She let this sink in for a few moments, then moved to the phone and began to order the pizza. *I did something really bad to Bob* thought Jay, his eyes were hot and stinging. *Does that mean that he will do something three times as bad to me?* With that thought, an anguished groan escaped his lips and he curled up in a ball on the couch, clutching his beer to his chest, and letting the tears come. He vaguely noticed Lilly cancel the order, hang up the phone and sit down next to him. He didn't protest when she took his beer and pulled him to her. And it barely registered with him when she said, "As for payment. You can tell me your story." ****************************** Jay had finally calmed down by 10pm. They were both tired, but Lilly seemed to be waiting for something. "What?" asked to blonde on the verge of sleep. "You will have to tell me what happened sometime Jay. I need to know if I can do something to help." she replied. He nodded, knowing it was true, but unsure as to how to start. Seeing the confliction in his eyes, Lilly decided to leave it for that evening. She got up, fetched some bed linen and a patchwork quilt, and helped Jay pull out the sofa bed. "Bathroom's the second door down." she told him, and walked into her bedroom to change. She could hear Jay moving around in the living room as she put on her plaid flannel pyjamas. Deciding to get a glass of water, she opened the door and walked through the living room into the kitchen. When she was done, she stood in the doorway, watching Jay get settled in bed. Realising that this was a bit too voyeuristic even for her, she made her way back to her room, only to be stopped in her tracks by Jay softly calling her name. "Lilly," he practically whispered, "Thank you, " then he closed his eyes and began to drift off. "Sweet dreams Jay." she replied quietly and went to bed. ############################################# next insatallment should be up next week. ############################################# Here are the lyrics to the song. It's the Tori Amos version. AIN'T NO SUNSHINE aint no sunshine when he's gone its not warm when he's away aint no sunshine when hes gone and hes always gone too long wonder this time where hes gone wonder if hes gone to stay aint no sunshine when hes gone and hes always gone too long anytime he goes away i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i oughtta leave it all alone but aint no sunshine when hes gone la la la la la I remember that...(?) i oughtta leave it all alone i know i oughtta leave this alone i wonder this time where hes gone i wonder if hes gone to stay Aint No Sunshine when hes gone and hes always gone too long anytime he goes away he goes.