Title: Dizzy Author: gracelessone Fandom: ViewAskewniverse Pairing: Jay and Silent Bob Rating: PG-13? lots of cursing, come on it's *Jay* we're talking 'bout Status: New Archive: oh I'd wait and see if it dwindles into a pile o crap Series: this should be a stand alone but I have no freakin' idea Disclaimer: I now own wonderful kitty cat pj's but I'm gonna wear the pants out and about, and 3 packs of smokes. oh yeah I'm pretty sure Kevin Smith owns the rest of the universe. Notes: it was supposed to be short and sweet! with lots of sex! my first fic and the little stoners are already giving me problems *grr* Summary: I *hate* summaries, I *suck* at summaries. so you don't get one. Sue me. Warnings: first time J/SB slasher *gulp* I really shoulda put this in sooner, but this thing is not beta'd, and this part was written at 2 am so you may find speeling mistakes. Dizzy "Are you sure this is cool?" Jay was standing just inside the door of Bob's apartment, colt-skittish and ready to bolt. Bob looked at him calmly. "Just business." "Yeah, s'business." Jay nodded a couple of times. "Yeah, business, k" Jay was only going to stay at Bob's until the dealing got profitable. A couple days turned into a couple of weeks and neither of them thought much about it, they were actually pretty comfortable together. Bob grabbed a couple of beers out of the fridge and thought about how surprising that realization had been. **such opposites, we *shouldn't* get along, I'm short he's tall. I'm fat he's skinny** He handed off one beer to the blonde draped across their couch. **dark/light loud/quiet... Hey! *my* couch** He shoved at Jay's feet with his knee until those long legs shifted. They settled into each other's space easily, Bob barely noticed when Jay threw his legs over his lap. Jay was channel surfing while doing a running commentary on every show. Bob was only half listening; his head was still throwing comparisons at him. **impulsive/restrained hyper/calm gay/straight as a fucking arrow** He shook his head free of that thought, and once again told his cock to stay *out* of this. **and you're bisexual asshole, you'd think *you* could get it right** **aw shut the fuck up** Great. Now he was arguing with his head. **besides, you don't know if Jay is straight or not** **yeah, like there's a doubt with all the 'gay, homo, cock-smoker' comments** Bob was, thankfully, pulled out of his thoughts by a shove from Jay. "Hey, Lunchbox! Ya listenin' to me? I said someone's at the door for ya." "Scott!" Bob stood and grabbed his old friend into a tight embrace. "It's been a long time... too long." Jay watched this and felt... he didn't know what the fuck he felt. Uncomfortable, like he didn't belong here. Mad, who was this fuck and why was he coming here? And why was Bob fucking *talking* to him? Uncomfortable won out. "Um, I'll go hang back here, leave ya 'lone." He was gone before Bob could stop him. He wanted Jay to meet Scott. **what? like bringing him home to meet the parents?** **fuck this. I'm not arguing with you now** Bob had known Scott since high school. When Bob finally admitted that he liked boys to himself, Scott was the first person he told. Scott knew all about his family, hell Scott knew *everything* about Bob. And loved him anyway. Scott was Bob's first lover in every sense of the word. He had talked him of off that cliff of self-abuse that comes part and parcel with Christianity. He showed him how to kiss, how to really kiss, soft and sweet and hard and demanding. He taught him how to make love to someone and fuck them senseless at the same time, and he taught him how to trust enough to actually sleep beside someone. They talked. With words and hands and smiles and raised eyebrows. Scott spoke fluent Bob-ese. They talked for almost an hour about everything, well, *almost* everything. The blonde boy was distinctly absent from the conversation. Scott was shrugging his coat on when he finally asked about Jay. He had seen all of the barriers and blockades Bob had thrown up during their talk. He shattered all of them in one stoke. "You're falling for him, if it gets bad you know where I am." Bob gasped, shaking his head and stretching out for words of denial, words of explanation, but Scott covered the brunette's lips with one finger. Bob decided his friend had gone clinically deranged and shoved any arguing voices down deep, kissing the finger that rested on his mouth. Scott didn't say anything else; he just pulled Bob into a soft hug and a softer kiss... lingering on his old friend's sweet mouth... nipping that full lush bottom lip and flicking his tongue over it quickly before moving away. Bob gave him an exasperated/frustrated/almost ready to laugh look and shoved him out the door. Jay was leaning against the wall in the hallway. He had finally ventured out just in time to see... well, to... to see... **fuck Bob just kissed that guy... not like that foreign shit kissing on each cheek or the Godfather kiss, that fuckin rocked, bam! He just shot that cock smoker-wait, back up, Bob just kissed that guy, really *kissed* him. **and it was hot** That little voice was ripped out and thrown into a deep place, much like Bob did, but this place was filled with swirls of red terror and streaks of blue pain covered by a choking grey smog of bleak despair. Jay threw himself on the couch and t ried not to think at all. Bob wandered into the kitchen, thinking that food might be a good idea soon but grabbing a beer instead. He walked into the living room and saw Jay draped across their couch. **my couch dammit** ----- The TV's light cast a blue glow over the beer bottles and empty pizza boxes, catching and dancing on the edges of the overflowing ashtray, slipping and sliding around the round sides of the bong before limping out to the two men on the couch. Jay wasn't sprawled across the couch this time; he was sitting curled up on one side instead. He was exactly cowering in the corner, but it was close. Bob had waited. He was good at waiting. He waited through dinner... and through two movies... he was done waiting. Bob clicked the TV off and faced Jay. "Okay. Talk." Jay jerked, his eyes wide and almost sapphire blue in the low light. He pulled his knees up to his chest and started pulling at the threads surrounding a tear in the jeans. He kept his head down, bowed, eyes locked on his knees, Bob just waited. He was good at waiting. Jay took a deep shuddering breath and Bob knew, he just *knew* that when that breath ran out Jay would be empty. A drained husk shivering in the cold blue light. "I just came out man, I wasn't watchin' or, well, I just saw yaknow, I saw you kissing that guy..." Bob nodded and Jay drew in another shaky breath. Good. "I just din't know, I woulda, well, fuck, I din't know fuck I wouldn't a said, shit Bob I thought you liked girls!!" "I do." Bob almost wanted to laugh at the confused blonde, but he knew Jay was sitting on the edge of something, maybe a few somethings. "Jay, I like both. Men and women. It's called bisexuality." The younger man shook his head quickly, as if to brush that information away... that wasn't what he was worried about, well it wasn't at the top of the list, second maybe... He shook his head again. This wasn't helping. "Bob, all tha' shit I say... I mean, fuck, I'm sor... I didn't mean nuthin by it..." "It didn't bother me yesterday, why would it bother me today? Or tomorrow?" Those blue eyes lifted up and he looked more like that kid outside the Quick Stop with his hands cuffed behind him than he had in weeks. Bob caught his gaze and held it. "What? I'm supposed to kick your ass? I'm too fucking tired for that shit." A quirk of and eyebrow and a quick half smile soothed the tall bundle of nerves curling on the edge of something... something bad. Something dangerous. Bob was going to find out what it was. TBC Oi, I have no control of this anymore, it's mutating on it's own now. gracie (click click boom)