Title: Gothic Rose
Author: eenodol 
Pairing: Jay/Silent Bob. 
Rating: R. (i think..)
Warnings: Gaity awaits. 
Archive: yes. i like being archived. 
E-mail address for feedback: eenodol@yahoo.com
Series/Sequel: part seis!
Summary: Bob wants Jay. So Bob becomes goth. Don't ask questions. It's gay 
logic. Get it? GAY logic? Ahahahahaha! Whew.

My note: I was working on this today in Chemistry class. This kid who sits 
next to me asked to read it. I warned him that he and his super conservative 
self would not like it, but he insisted. Not only was he too disturbed to 
read it all, but I think it may have permenately scarred him. Neato!
"Oh my gosh.. you are so f-f-freaking messed up! You said the f-word 
like three freaking times every line! You're creepy! Why can't you write 
happy stories about happy people who don't curse, use drugs, commit sins of 
homosexuality, or are mean?"
...

Jay walked past the gothic transvestite clothing store. "Mary Jane's?" 
he asked himself. "What the fuck kind of gay ass Tom fucking Petty name for 
a store is that? It just screams cocksmoker. Who the fuck in their right 
fucking mind would shop there?"

Jay turned around and retraced his steps back to Mary Jane's.

"Hi Bob's Jay," said a man who was shelving gay gothic pornographic 
greeting cards.

"What? Fuck no! He is so MY bitch. Or at least he would be, cept I 
ain't gay. You seen that tubby fucker? I think he got lost."

"Yeah, I saw him a couple hours ago," the man replied, going back to his 
shelving.

"Really? Where? I mean, where the fuck would that fat fuck go that you 
would go, too?"

"What I mean is, you suck cock. You're very, very gay. Like, super gay. 
Bob is not super gay."

"Maybe not SuperGay, but certainly WonderGay." The man giggled at 
himself.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Is this some kind gay code for 
gay people? You better stop it and just speak like a straight person, cuz I 
ain't no queer talking butt fucker. I'm all about the pink and the lady 
brown." Jay grabbed his crotch.

"No, smart ass, it's a gay code for every-" Jay cut him off.

"What the fuck are you rambling about? All i fucking want to know is 
where the fuck is Bob and how the fuck much is that fucking Rose McGowen 
poster."

"Which poster?" the clerk asked, turning to look at a shelf of Rose 
McGowen posters.

"The one where she's really really fucking hot, ya stupid faggot."

"Um, Jay dear, think over that last sentence.

"Why the fuck should I?" The clerk didn't answer. He just stared at Jay 
pointedly. "Fine, fine. Whatever," Jay said touchily. He began to mumble 
the sentence back to himself. " 'Pick a hot poster, you fucking faggot...' 
What's the problem?"

The clerk sighed, then turned, picked up a poster, and unfurled it for 
Jay's inspection.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, you gay fuck? She looks like a fucking 
guy in that one!"

"I think it's hot," the clerk mumbled and put the poster back.

"And why the fuck are you showing me fucking Rose McGowen posters when 
you're supposed to be telling me where Tubby is?"

"I don't know where 'Tubby' is," the man gave Jay an exasperated glare, 
"But I do have a good idea."


.tbc.