Title: Hopeless And Devoted (4/4) Author: Flameboi Pairing: J/SB Rating: NC-17 baybee! Archive: Yes Feedback: Please Disclaimer: Don't own, Kevin owns, Miramax owns, not me. I own nada, no sue I. Summary: Well, I think this is the end of this one.. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Hopeless And Devoted Jay kept putting it off and putting it off, though he'd all but run back to the hospital, but visit after visit, he'd start to tell Bob what he'd realized, what he felt, and his throat would close up, his mouth would snap shut, bringing an arched eyebrow from Bob; Jay was dead scared that if he told Bob that he loved him, loved him like THAT, Bob would look at him horrified, or laugh, or worst of all, leave him. That Bob loved him, Jay knew, but he'd never really shown that it was anything beyond the sort of love that best buds share, nothing beyond the fact that Bob stuck with him no matter how much shit he dished out, or the looks that Bob sometimes gave Jay when he'd taken a pause in his constant ranting. Well, that was often, now; Jay had become almost as silent, with the burden of what he had to say, as Bob. Days passed, and the tension grew until Jay thought his head was going to explode; nights passed and Jay spent them at their apartment, jerking off in Bob's bed after reading up on gay sex on the internet, just so he'd know exactly what he was fantasizing about. Otherwise, Jay had to give a formal statement to the police, and then found out he wouldn't even be testifying, since Pinky's lawyer had put in for a reduced sentence in return for a guilty plea. Asshole. Bastard would be skinned fuckin ALIVE if Jay had his way. Still, he now had a pretty good idea how the pleasure he was frustrating himself to death over thinking about with Bob, could be pretty damn unpleasurable, if done without any care or preparation, and he took satisfaction in picturing Pinky getting fucked in prison, just like that, painfully. A week and a half, and Bob was released, with the warnings about taking it easy and the appointment for the first follow-up check up, and, back home, Jay knew he had to tell him, finally, had to say or do something, but how, and what? How long he would have stalled might have stretched out infinitely, if Bob hadn't been the one to speak up for a change, "Jay, man. Just say it already. Whatever it is, it'll be all right," in that low wonderful voice, his eyes locked into Jay's, calm and curious and some other emotion Jay couldn't read. "Shit Lunchbox, just fuckin say it? Like THAT?!" Jay started off, running a hand through his long blond hair; Bob nodded. Jay sat down beside him on the couch. "Ok. Shit. Its like this. I love your ass. I mean, I love you. You know. Like, makin with the love, wanting your dick, all that gayass shit." Bob, amazingly, infuriatingly, just nodded again, a little smile dancing on his lips. Jay stared at him, "Godamnit, Tubby! Fuckin SAY something!" Bob blinked, and took a breath audibly, then, "I know. I was waiting for you to figure it out. I love you too, like that. Have for years." Jay just looked stunned, his mouth was even hanging slightly open; he closed it, then slid closer to Bob, "So you're ok with that?" Bob nodded, smiling wider; "You want to fuck me, Bob?" Bob nodded again, full on grinning this time. Jay looked down at Bob's lap, and saw the rise in Bob's baggy jeans at the thought, getting the same exact reaction himself. "Well shit, what're we waiting for Lunchbox?" Jay never had a lot of trouble stripping himself fast, which was the first thing he did, shedding clothes in record time until he stood in only his socks with his hardon pointing up at the air, and then he went to work on Bob's clothes, somewhat less effectively, since he tried to do it, sitting on his lap, and leaning in to kiss him. The kiss was something from the golden age of Hollywood combined with really top shelf porn, Jay's lips seemed to melt into Bob's, almost, soft but not too soft, the feel of his beard scratchy and tickling, wonderful, and the smoke and coffee taste of Bob's lips; their tongues sought one another at the same time, eager and slippery and wrapping around each other like hungry baby eels. Jay's dick rubbed against Bob, and he moaned into the kiss, reaching under to try and free Bob from his jeans; Bob just wrapped his arms around Jay and kissed him hard, closing his eyes, and moaning himself when Jay's hand found Bob's long, hard cock, at the same time that Jay started sucking his tongue; Jay broke the kiss when he slid off Bob's lap and ended up kneeling between his legs. "Check this shit out, Lunchbox," he grinned, licking his lips, and bending in close. Bob's eyes looked like they were going to pop out of his head at the sensation of Jay's tongue licking up along his cock, and he groaned and slid his fingers into the long blond hair when Jay started to suck, slow at first, uncertain, his mouth a little dry, but as Jay got into it, his mouth got slicker with saliva, and Bob couldn't believe how good it felt- Jay couldn't believe how right it felt, that he was sucking a dick and loving it, but then, it was Bob's dick, and everytime he licked, Bob would moan softly, when his mouth slid down he could feel the fingers in his hair twitch. Fucking BEAUTIFUL. Jay reached down one hand, taking his own cock in his hand and jerking off while he slurped up and down Bob's cock; pulling back, he flicked his tongue over the tip, tasting the salt of precum, moaning at Bob and looking up at him, then starting to suck him faster, his mouth moving up and down, so damn hot on Bob's dick, while Bob gasped and groaned louder, his hips getting into it, small thrusts he couldn't help. Jay gagged a little, and pulled back off, and then he was gone with a slide of silk hair through Bob's fingers: Bob blinked his eyes open, wondering what the hell, muttering, "Jay?" - actually, he was worried that Jay had started to freak out, but before he could get up, Jay was back, cock bobbing as he bounced around on his toes, and waving the tube of lube at Bob, grinning hugely, while he squirted half the tube into his hand and then made Bob gasp again, first with cold, then with sensation, as he slicked Bob's cock with the extra running into his pubes. Jay crawled up straddling over Bob, "Now you just take it easy like the doc said, I'll do allll the work," he crooned, teasing. Bob nodded and helped support him there, hands on his lower back, while Jay held on to the back of the couch with the hand not steadying Bob's dick. Jay sat down, fast, too fast. Bob groaned in almost pain, then the most incredible sensation he'd ever felt, as his cock was forced all at once into unbelievable tightness and heat; Jay's face was a mask of pain, and Bob, looking up as he felt the slender body shudder on top of him, felt like his heart was going to stop, just looking at him now. Jay was still, not moving, taking long deep breaths, Bob opened his mouth, but Jay just shook his head and grinned. "I'm ok, just gimme a second," since he knew Bob was maybe about to stop him, or try, and no way was he stopping now. Jay started moving slowly, both hands on the couch's back now, pulling himself up with his legs and arms, lowering himself down; fuck did it ever hurt, like being ripped open, but the expression on Bob's face, half-closed eyes, open gasping mouth, made it worth it, that and hearing his groans. Bob's hips moved as he thrust with Jay's momentum, just a small thrust, and his eyes flew open fully again hearing the yowl the blonde boy let out; Jay was the one looking shocked now, shocked and ecstatic. "FUUuck Lunchbox! Do that AGAIN!" he demanded, his cock fully hard again against Bob's abdomen. Jay slammed himself down again while Bob thrust up, apparently managing to 'do it again', since Jay kept hollering on every thrust and non-stop moaning, riding him harder and faster, delirious with pleasure. Bob couldn't take much of that, and he slid a hand around Jay's cock as he felt himself start to come, a groan of, "oh-god-Jay!" and another thrust into his lover, then emptying himself inside Jay. Jay felt him still, felt Bob's cock twitch hard inside him, and knew the man he loved, knew that Bob, was coming, and saying his name while he did it; Bob's hand tightened around Jay's aching dick and that was all it took, and Jay yelled "OHFUCK!BOB!FUCK!" and was spurting all over them both. Coming down, dazed with the aftershock and panting softly, Jay let himself rest against Bob, holding him, not moving, still impaled. No, still joined, Bob's cock inside his ass, Bob's arm around him, his cheek on Bob's shoulder, Bob's fast breath in his ear, and he whispered, voice a little stunned and shaky, "Love you." Bob's hand came up Jay's sweaty back, and caressed gently over his long, now damp, hair; "I love you, too, Jay. Always have. Always will." Jay blinked at the words, and smiled, pressing a kiss against the side of Bob's throat, "Yeah?" ..and Bob held him, and nodded.