Title: "Moments Wasted"
Author: Kelandris the Mad
Fandom: View Askewniverse
Pairing: Jay/Silent Bob
Rating: I'd push this one to NC-17 for mentions of hot sweaty man sex.
 Or at least hot sweaty dreams.  And a lot of Jay being sexually
repressed. :>
Status: posted to the list 16 December 2004, written a couple years
prior.  Can't recall if I already posted this; couldn't find it on a
scan-through of the archive.
Archive:  Drop me a note and it's yours.  And on that note...
Feedback: kel@crazysheep.net
Series/Sequels:  Sort of-kind of sequels "Why?"
Disclaimers:  All parts of my fannish being are enriched by the
presence of Kevin Smith, Jason Mewes, Jason Lee, Ben Affleck, and all
the merry characters at View Askew Productions (including their
current master, Miramax) save for that pesky financial part of my
being, which receives no compensation whatsoever for these tawdry
little tales.
Notes:  Oddly enough, I think this one's a sequel to "Why?".
Originally a songfic, decided when reading through it didn't need to
be.  But it was a different breakup song, same kind of reaction,
different setting.  Ooh, more Jay angst.
Summary: Jay wants something very badly, and wonders if he can have it.
Warnings: Merest whiffs of the non-consensual.  Lots of restraint. 
More twitching than I usually write.

===============================


"Moments Wasted"
by Kelandris


*some may say I love to let
a good thing go to waste
I let it go to waste*

*Jay was running.  Jay was always running.  Just running, hair
streaming behind him, mouth open in a scream.  Some new threat, some
old enemy, something implacable and unbeatable stalked him through the
bloodied city streets, and Bob couldn't keep up.  Couldn't keep up,
couldn't stay close enough to save him.  And any minute now, the
screaming, the screaming that meant he'd lost Jay again to the night.*

Bob murmured in his sleep, turning over.  Moonlight traced his limbs
in silver, and traced the other man in the room in reflected light. 
Moving slower than he'd ever moved in his life, Jay sat on Bob's bed,
looking at the planes and angles revealed by the thin sheet.  He
assumed it had been pulled up to cover his shoulders at the beginning
of the night, but now, it had slipped down to Bob's waist, revealing
dark curling hair on the chest.  Bob was turned to face the blond as
Jay leaned over, stroking across the air an inch away from Bob's
shoulder and left arm.

Something in him hurt with the need to touch, the need to let Bob know
what he felt.  He felt his head start to shake and stilled it through
force of effort.  He couldn't.  He couldn't ever let Bob know.  He
knew about Bob, he'd heard about him before they'd ever met, but he
knew there had to be more to him than the street persona.  There were
rumors that he'd sent people to the hospital.  There were rumors that
he'd killed.  But no, not his Bob.  Not with those eyes. He swallowed,
uncomfortable, wanting to do so much more than look.  Biting his lip,
he started to turn away.

*Did something penetrate?  Was something heard?  The dream altered,
Jay running, but running now for the hell of it, scrambling up the
hill and over to the structure on the other side, swaying rope bridge
and tire swing and a captain's turret complete with a porthole, the
heavy glass glinting in the uncertain light.

*And Bob scrambled up after him, laughing in sheer joy.  The sky burst
with colors, rose, orange, pink, gold, tinting Jay's saffron hair
coral.  And Jay moved up to the captain's turret, swung inside on the
center pole, then poked his head back out, smiling at Bob. Mystified,
Bob followed.

*Inside it was dark, but larger than it looked on the outside. There
was room for both of them to sit side by side, and he did, realizing
the porthole was in front of him.  His hometown spread out below them,
lights just starting to dot the landscape here and there.  And then
Jay leaned over, kissing him.*

"Ahhh..." Bob moaned faintly, and Jay turned back.  Bob had rolled
onto his back, his head falling back on the pillow.  His eyes moved
rapidly under his closed lids.  Jay leaned closer, swallowing, afraid
to breathe.

"Jaaay..." he whispered.  Jay flinched back, looking around.  Then,
licking his lips, he leaned forward, leaning towards Bob's ear.

"I'm here, Bob," he murmured.

"I'm here, Bob," he heard, and then Jay kissed him again.  It was
good, it was sweet, it was touching.  He blinked, peering out of the
porthole again, and thus completely missed Jay's pounce.  

*Jay bowled him over, tearing at his clothes, nuzzling each inch of
revealed skin, and Bob could barely breathe.  He swallowed, over and
over, and bit his lip when Jay licked across his belly.*

"Uhhh..."

Bob shifted under the sheet, and Jay's eyes widened as he watched the
sheet over Bob's legs tent upwards.  Greatly daring, he slid tentative
fingers underneath the sheet, lifting it from Bob's moving body.  He
pulled it back and saw Bob's cock for the first time, twitching and
growing hard.  Growing large.  He imagined it briefly in his mouth, in
other places, and he shuddered out a breath, trembling all over.

*Jay licked across his belly, pulling his pants down, tugging at his
shorts, and then his cock popped free, twitching in the chill evening
air.  Jay didn't hesitate--he leaned forward, engulfing Bob, and Bob
screamed, jackknifed up, and grabbed Jay's head.*

"Fuck, Jay, fuck...Jay, fuck..." he keened, his hands dropping back,
clenching on the bed sheets.

Jay's mouth grew wet at the thought.  Bob was dreaming of him.  Bob
was dreaming about doing things to him, or...could he hope?...him
doing things to Bob.  Daring again, breath still in his lungs, he
traced one finger across the tip of Bob's twitching cock, feeling the
softest skin he'd ever felt in his life rubbing against his callused
fingertip.  It made him shiver all over, breath shuddering out of him
then, and he fought back moans.

"Ah!" Bob cried, eyelids fluttering.  Pre-cum leaked from his cock,
and Jay longed to lean down and taste him.  Oh, fuck, this was
torture.  Why had he ever come in?  What he wanted...shit, if Bob
didn't want it he'd be fucking *justified* in wiping the floor with
him.  But...he looked at Bob, revealed under moonlight's silver glow,
and moaned softly.  Biting his lip again, he leaned down, extending
his tongue as far as it could go, touching just the tip of it to the
tip of Bob's cock.  One quick lick, Jay's eyes rolling back in his
head, and he was up, still feeling Bob bouncing against his lower lip.
 Mmm.

And shit, taste of Bob in his mouth now, wanting more, wanting more,
so sharp, like knives along his spine.  God, fuck, he didn't remember
*heroin* pulling him this bad.  He sat on Bob's bed, trembling, and
watched him, watched him with big wet eyes.

*Jay's head bobbed up and down, and Bob arched back, crying out Jay's
name.  His fingers tangled in that cornsilk hair, and his hips bucked
upwards, thrusting him deep into Jay's mouth.  But Jay didn't seem to
mind, wanting more, clutching his hips, pulling them towards him.  OH,
yeah.  SO much better.  He thrust rapidly in and out of Jay's ardent
mouth, moaning, clenching, shaking with need.  And Jay murmured to
him, murmured against him, no words that he caught, but the sound, the
sound enough of love and care and joy and bliss and rapture to carry
him over, carry him over, spurting helplessly into Jay's sucking
mouth.  And Jay never let go, swallowing everything, swallowing it
all, tonguing him clean.  He sucked on him until, sleepy, Bob started
to soften again, and only then did Jay pull away, fading back into the
shadows, leaving him alone in the night.*

"Jay?" Bob murmured, sitting up.  He was cold.  The sheet was a puddle
around his ankles, and he rubbed his head, struggling to remember the
dream.  Something about Jay...Something about Jay...sucking...him...

He sat up, his eyes wide, and looked down.  His cock was wet.  Not
covered in slowly cooling fluid, not that.  But wet.  And...he reached
down, touching tentatively...still warm.

**What the hell?**

And in the other room, Jay curled on his side, fighting the urge to go
back to Bob's room.  He could still taste Bob on his tongue,
remembered the feeling of Bob's hands in his hair as he sucked him in,
sucked all of him in, nearly knocked out himself by the force of the
want in him.  The want for Bob.  The want to fuck Bob.  The want to
hold Bob and lick him and kiss him and suck him and God, God, why?  *Why?*

END
(Lyric snip from the story start is from Smashmouth's "Waste")
*****************
Kelandris the Mad
one more casualty of love