Title:  Sex, Lies and Videotape
Author: Grampy Volvo (manicsubsidal1983@yahoo.com)
Pairing:  Jay/Randal
Rating:  NC-17
Archive:  Absolutely! (with permission)
Warning:  Excessive enthusiasm? (You'll know what I mean later.)  
Also, first Jay/Randal fic.  Umm, yeah, and definitely PWP.
Disclaimer:  No ownership whatsoever.  All fiction.
Author's Note:  This story was inspired by Jeff Anderson's lips 
in "Clerks".  They were the best part of the movie.  Beta'd by one of 
my top 5 bestest friends in the whole wide world, Alex.


Jay sauntered into RST Videos on a cold Saturday night, almost 
dancing to music in his head.  "Yo," he murmured to Randal as he 
checked out the limited video selection.

Randal didn't even look up from the Playboy he was "reading".  "What 
do you want?" he sighed.  He'd been working since early morning and 
he cared little about any customers even then.

"Jeez, you could at least fucking look at me once in a while."  Jay 
stopped in front of the counter and smirked devilishly as Randal tore 
his eyes away from the Playboy centerfold.

"Didn't know it was you, pretty boy."  Randal smiled as he recognized 
the smirking face.  He looked around the empty store.  "Where's your 
shadow?"

Jay rolled his eyes as he was reminded of Silent Bob and said, "I 
left my Lunchbox at home."  He shrugged rather cutely and sat on the 
counter.

"Well, then, what are you here for?"

"Did it ever cross your fucking mind that I might be here to see 
you?"  Mock annoyance seasoned Jay's voice.  He turned his head and 
gave a smile and a wink.  Randal grinned; it hadn't crossed his mind 
at all - especially not in the way Jay meant - but the idea, now the 
only thing he could think about, fired him up more than the magazine 
in his hands.

Randal put the Playboy under the counter, slid his hands around Jay's 
waist and whispered, "You mean, you chose me over Silent Bob?"  He 
gasped sarcastically, kissed Jay on the neck and said, "Gosh, that's 
sweet."

"Less talk," Jay said, spinning around to face Randal.  He wrapped 
his legs around Randal's waist and drew him into a kiss.  He unzipped 
his hoodie and let it fall to the floor while Randal took off his 
jacket.

"Less kissing," Randal mumbled as he and Jay discarded each other's 
hats.  He kissed Jay's collarbone one last time before disrobing the 
both of them from the waist up.  Jay dislodged himself from Randal to 
lay sideways on the counter.  Randal straddled him, pinning his arms 
above his head and grinning again as he looked into his eyes.

"Fuck me."  Jay was always so straightforward with his 
desires.  "Fuck me now, Randal."  Randal had no choice but to obey; 
even though Jay was on the bottom, he still had complete control.

Randal backed off of Jay and took off the rest of his clothes while 
Jay did the same.  He hopped over the counter and looked outside - 
thankfully, there were no potential customers in sight.  He returned 
the counter and pulled Jay's legs up so they rested on his 
shoulders.  "You ready?" Randal asked in a deep whispery voice.

"Hell yeah, do it!  Do it!  Do - oh . . ."  Jay felt heat wash over 
his body as Randal entered.

"Oooooh, jeez."  Randal couldn't keep the moan from escaping his 
lips.  He held Jay's thighs to restrain himself and he slowly resumed 
thrusting.

"Fuck . . ."  The line in Jay's head between pain and pleasure 
blurred as Randal pounded faster and faster.

"Oh my fucking God!"  Randal knew he couldn't take much more of this.

"Yes!" Jay screamed, his voice rising in pitch as well as 
volume.  "Yes!  Yes!  Oh yes!"

"Yeah!  Oh, fuck, yes!"  Randal ran his hands through Jay's hair and 
made fists in it.

"Don't stop, don't you fucking stop!" Jay demanded, grabbing Randal's 
hips.

"I'm gonna - I'm gonna - fuck - oh!"  And with that, Randal spilled 
his seed inside Jay.  He pulled out, releasing Jay's hair and wiping 
sweat from his forehead.

"Aww, why the fuck did you do that?" Jay implored painfully, almost 
about to burst.

Randal smiled.  "You didn't think I was done, did you?"  He winked 
and moved further down the counter to be eye-level with Jay's waist 
and took him entirely into his mouth.

"Shit!" Jay shouted, grabbing Randal's hair and instinctively 
thrusting into the sweet warm wetness.  "Oh, yes -"  Jay felt 
Randal's tongue run along his entire length.  "Fuck, I'm gonna 
come!"  Jay felt like his entire body was exploding as he came.  
Randal swallowed as quickly as he could and sat up smiling from ear 
to ear with his back to him.

Jay laid his head on Randal's shoulder and kissed him on the 
neck.  "I bet I'm the best fuck you ever had," he said, beaming 
arrogantly.

"Even if you were, I wouldn't give you the satisfaction of knowing," 
Randal smirked, kissing Jay on the nose.

"You know you fucking love it."  Jay winked, gathering his clothes 
and putting them on.  Randal shot him a dirty look as he put on his 
pants and jacket.  Jay shrugged in the same pleasant way he had 
before.

"By the way," Jay said, looking around anxiously.  "If Silent Bob 
finds out, I'll fucking kill you in your sleep.  Got it?"

"You couldn't kill your way out of a paper bag," Randal 
smirked.  "But I won't tell no one anyway."

Jay smiled and nodded.  "Good night, lover," he said.  He looked up 
at the clock.  "Morning, I guess."

"Until next time, Jay."  Randal walked out from behind the counter 
and kissed Jay tenderly on the lips.  They walked out together and 
Randal locked the door to the store before they parted ways on the 
empty sidewalk.